The prince and princess came to tea today. (Charles and Camilla?) Hard to tell. They were invisible. (If it WAS Charles and Camilla, invisible would be a Good Thing.) But they must have been special because my daughter got all dressed up in high heels and perfume and laid out her tea set for them.
Conversation (one-sided) went like this:
“He did WHAT?”
“I can’t believe he’s such a jerk.”
“How could he do that to her?”
At nine my daughter has already absorbed a basic tenet of womanhood. Men are always wrong. Even if you have to make it up.
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So I leave later than usual yesterday to pick up my kids from school. I pick up my daughter at School #1. We’re on the way to School #2 to pick up my oldest son (younger son is home puking in the kitchen sink). I look at the clock in the car. I left ten minutes late for School #1 and yet somehow I am five minutes early to School #2.
I said to my daughter, “I left late but we’re here early. How did that happen?”
She said, without skipping a beat, “Easy. You control time!”
By Jove, she’s right. What other explanation can there be? I’M LIKE A FREAKING PAX AGENT.
FYI, last night she suggested that she looks “too good for the bus” now. This is the latest scheme directed at getting out of school based on blinding beauty.
I have decided that I am too beautiful for toilet cleaning. (Apparently this can work because she did talk her daddy into driving her to school today. They usually take the bus in the mornings!)
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